Building resilient minds: How can we protect and enhance children's mental health?

Mental health is rarely out of the headlines. As recently as 22 January 2025 ITV News led with, “‘Significant rise’ in children admitted to acute wards for mental health issues”. Stories like this can be alarming and distressing, fuelling anxiety in educators and parents. As we celebrate Children’s Mental Health Week, these reports also serve as a call to action. As parents and educators, we have the power to create environments that foster resilience, confidence, and wellbeing in children.

What does mental wellbeing actually mean? I think we can all agree on what we think and feel is a healthy state of mind, but more than that? The World Health Organization (WHO) defines it as; "…a state of wellbeing in which every individual realises his or her own potential, can cope with the normal stresses of life, work productively and fruitfully, and is able to make a contribution to her or his community." It’s not just about the absence of illness but about thriving—helping children cope with life’s challenges, build strong relationships, and find joy in their lives. But how can we, as the adults in their lives, make this a reality?

Many of us are now familiar with brain-healthy habits we should complete on a regular basis and with the exception of sleep and, to some degree, diet, we as school practitioners can positively influence all of them: exercise, gratitude, volunteering, new learning, exposure to sunshine, playing, and music.

Like many schools in the independent sector, at Dulwich College Kindergarten and Infant School (DUCKS), we are fortunate to have grounds and sports coaches ensuring a plentiful combination of play, exercise and (occasional) sunshine. Exercise which involves coordination is of paramount importance, as that stimulates the cerebellum which contains more than half of the brain’s neurons and is connected to all other parts of the brain. Maybe my children’s tennis lessons weren’t wasted after all!

Studies show that your emotional health at age 16 is one of the best indicators of positive mental health. Brain health is the foundation of mental health and just as the heart is an organ, so is the brain. We can tell children that they need to exercise and that it is important for their health but that will not provide them with a healthy brain. Science tells us that the experiences we have in the first years of our lives actually affect the physical architecture of the brain. Brains develop based upon our experiences, therefore if we want children to grow into kind, resilient, motivated, and responsible individuals who lead happy, competent lives, these qualities must be nurtured consistently and intentionally.

My experience as a trained facilitator of the parenting nurture programmes developed by The Centre for Emotional Health, coupled with wider reading, have led me to believe that we need to give children opportunities, independence and competence, so that later in life they do not struggle with their self-esteem. If we do too much, thinking it is love and care, then we are prohibiting them from competency. Children need to be able to make mistakes and to learn from them. In the early years those mistakes are low stakes and children learn to pay the ‘affordable consequences’ for their actions. Better to forget your water bottle and homework as a child than something more serious as an adult. 

We also need to enable children to solve problems. If a child says, “I am bored”, ask them how they are going to solve the problem of boredom. Then, be quiet - allow them to solve the problem on their own. When we give children the space to think and solve problems independently and learn from their mistakes, we’re giving them the greatest gift of all: true self-esteem and self-efficacy. A child who learns they can handle challenges today becomes the resilient adult of tomorrow.

Something that I believe is occasionally overlooked in schools, and even in some homes, is the importance of connections. Our role is to educate, but it must be founded on positive relationships between children and educators. An easy way of forming a bond is through active listening, but that takes time – and with a frequently packed timetable and parents working long hours that is not always easy. At DUCKS we are fortunate to have ‘family dining’ and a gentle walk across the playing fields to the weekly swimming lesson, providing ample opportunities for chat. Even 20 minutes of undivided attention—listening to how their day went or playing a simple game—can strengthen your connection. It’s the small moments that build trust and security.

If we commit to fostering independence, building meaningful connections, and creating brain-healthy habits at school and at home, we can change the narrative for the next generation. The mental health crisis is real—but so is our ability to make a difference. Let’s start today. Whether it’s organising a gratitude exercise or simply spending more time listening, let’s use Children’s Mental Health Week as a starting point for lifelong change.